This morning, a Maya Angelou quote comes to mind:
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
I was chatting with a friend yesterday who’s found himself in an all-too-familiar situation: his career’s picking up and his manager, a long time buddy, is out of his depth. My friend’s tried everything, and his manager just can’t keep up. He knows he’s got to let him go but is afraid he’ll lose a friend in the process.
This is a tricky situation, no two ways about it, but you absolutely have to sit down, look that person in the eyes and tell them what’s up. Will they be upset? Sure, that’s almost guaranteed. Will they say things in the heat of the moment they’ll regret? Very possible. It’s also likely, I told my friend, that your manager knows he’s out of his depth and will appreciate your honest assessment. He may even be relieved.
However it goes down in the moment, it’ll be just that- in the moment, and fairly quickly moved on from. If you don’t let him go now with transparency and compassion, what results is infinity worse than temporary discomfort- communication breakdown, leading to people connecting dots they have no business connecting, which leads to humiliation, resentment and a whole lot of bridges burned.
I’ve seen this happen so many times, and it’s stupid. It makes me angry.
We artists are typically bad at this kind of thing. Firing people sucks. But it’s exponentially worse creating an environment where people feel less-than. It's said that time heals all wounds, but not that one.
I’m thankful for:
-not being a big Vampire Weekend fan
I’m surrounded by hipsters at the Red Bicycle and, I dunno, for some reason I’m just kinda stoked that I don’t dig that band.
-sitting down and writing this thing
I really didn’t want to. It’s Sunday, I bargained, and isn’t this supposed to be a day of rest, etc? But I’m here, and it feels good.
-the cappuccinos at Red Bicycle being a full dollar cheaper than Pinewood Social
Hipster commerce is a frustrating thing sometimes. But don’t worry, both the Red Bicycle and Pinewood Social are staffed by Brooklyn transplants, so the ironic, distressed sweatshirt game’s strong.
January 7! YES!